Wanted: Life Admin PA (as I'm incapable of managing my life)

For someone who is very much all about the process, hitting deadlines and being in control for my job, when it comes to my own life admin I’m truly shocking.

I know I work best under pressure and being lastminute dot com in many areas of my life seems to have served me kind-of-ok for the past 20 odd years (I mean, I’m still alive and appear to be functioning as an adult), but my inability to complete normal life admin without incorporating either a significant delay or building some kind of drama around what I’m meant to be doing, continues to astound me.

I have the best intentions.  Endless to-do lists are made (the ones where I’ll secretly add things I’ve already completed so I can smugly tick them off before I've started the things I'm actually supposed to be doing - well hello avoidance tactic).  Reminders are set on my phone and actions are recorded on calendars.  And then I watch myself snooze or ignore them all until the VERY LAST MOMENT.  Ever played Russian roulette with your buildings insurance because you’ve kept putting off making the phone call to find out why your renewal quote has gone up 30%*. Or played chicken with that planning permission application that’s going to take 8 weeks to come through, yet the builders are on standby to start work in 7?  Taken a punt on the latest you can leave it to book a table for your whole family at the most popular restaurant in town at Christmas**?  Put off sending the booking email to the cattery jeopardising your entire holiday because you don’t know if she’d prefer you to complete the online booking form (even though you’ve never done it that way before).  Left your tax return until....(no, wait, scrap that one - we ALL do that).  But if you’ve ever done anything remotely similar - come join me so we can commiserate our lack of “getting our shit together” well, I guess, together.

One of the things I have been putting off recently, is my draft will which has been sitting nonchalantly on my desk.  Which is fine, if it hadn’t been sitting there, waiting for signatures for two years now.  And I’ve got a pension transfer form (bleugh - serious adult shit) that’s been waiting for me to sign and send back for 6 months now.  And of course, my worry now is that I’ve left it TOO long to respond and I’m panicking  about the grovelling email that I need to write, apologising for my tardiness.  And I’m really trying not to think about whether I’ve inconvenienced other professionals by not sending these things back - I’m assuming I haven’t and their file on me has just been dropped on to their “another can’t be bothered person” pile of papers (and before anyone asks - all these professional services have been paid for, so no one is suffering financial loss through my inability to commit to completing paperwork - apart from myself obviously.  THIS IS ALL YOUR OWN FAULT MANDY).

So I need someone whose going to sort this - or me - out.  Perhaps providing some motivational statements each day - or to micro manage my to-do list to keep me honest.  Or to give me some kind of reward or punishment (saucy) to get me to take some kind of accountability and actually do this stuff on time.  I offer nothing in return, other than the satisfaction that you’ll be helping out a disorganised friend in need (and if that’s not appealing, I guess I could stretch to some free HR advice - how exciting).  Any takers??

*don’t worry, I didn’t take the easy way out and just renew - I did reluctantly “compare the market”

**I never learn this one and we always end up crammed in somewhere random